Hopefully this goes without saying, but just so it does get said: If you (or anyone dear to you) ever find yourself with an unplanned pregnancy where parenting isn’t a good option, please know that you can still choose life for your baby! You are precious, and your child is precious too ❤️ I’m not just saying this because we’re hoping to adopt. I’m saying it because through the process of seeking to adopt, I’ve gained an immense appreciation for what a beautiful blessing adoption can be for an expectant mother during a very difficult time of her life.
Adoption doesn’t look like it used to, and it’s not like what the movies portray either. Over the past several decades, there’s been a huge movement towards open adoption—which means that even though someone else raises your child, choosing adoption isn’t a forever good-bye. You can develop a relationship with the adoptive family, even before baby is born. After adoption, you can still have contact. You can arrange for pictures, or letters, or even regular visits with your child as they grow up. Or you can have less contact too, if you’d rather. It’s up to you.
If you are an expectant mother, any professional services you receive while looking into or planning adoption are free for you. If you do choose adoption, the adoptive family can offer financial assistance during your pregnancy as well.
Even if you make an adoption plan, you are not obligated to choose adoption. In fact, you can’t even make a legally binding decision until after baby is born. This is honestly pretty nerve-wracking for the adoptive family, but it is your right. You get to make your own choice about who raises your child.
Throughout the adoption process, you realize that you are not alone. You receive support from case workers, have free access to counseling, and receive so much love and gratitude from the adoptive family that you choose.
And I do mean “choose”. You have total control over which family adopts your baby. And goodness, do you have a lot of options! For every infant adoption in the US, there are nearly ten other families still waiting to adopt. Each of these families has spent thousands (if not tens of thousands) of dollars to get to this point. They’ve done intensive background checks and trainings, and they are incredibly dedicated to being the best parents that they could possibly be.
Obviously, we are praying for our own match one day. But if this reaches even one mama who needs it—whether or not she chooses us—that makes it worth it. Yes, adoption is a very hard decision to make. And no, it won’t solve all your problems. But adoption is a very beautiful thing. I admire any mama who makes that very brave and mature choice on behalf of her baby.